A is for Apple

Europe is too big to fail?  What in the name of God and Goddess is the Federal Reserve thinking?  It’s been three centuries since Sir Isaac Newton followed in Eve’s footsteps and got empirically revelatory with an apple, leaving us with the Law of Universal Gravitation.  Ben Bernanke must not have been paying attention when his elementary school teacher taught this lesson.

I am not an economist, nor a physicist, nor a mathematician.  But I live here with the rest of you in the real world and I know that I’m not exempt from natural laws.  I’ve sung with Jimmy Cliff “the harder they come, the harder they fall, one and all” (1).  I understand that what goes up must come down.  Is the Fed simply dumb?  Do they think we’re that dumb too?

Of course what the Fed will say is that Sir Isaac Newton disproved his own law.  That if an object has sufficiently high upward velocity, gravity will not in the end be able to wrestle it back down to earth.  Instead, that object will attain a hyperbolic orbit.

So perhaps they are doing something right.  Maybe there really will be “a pie up in the sky waiting for me when I die.”  I say grow this baby on cheap credit formula until it soars straight off the planet.  We’d all be better off.

But seriously, is anyone thinking of the crash to come?  Surely we have learned by now that no bubble means no crash.

How about steady, super slow growth over time?  Is that too hard to fathom?  I’ve got kids, I expect them to have kids some day, so you can bet your ass I’m thinking about it.  Moves like this by the Fed mean my kids are already facing a life of puppetry, or dare I even say slavery?

“The purpose of these actions is to ease strains in financial markets and thereby mitigate the effects of such strains on the supply of credit to households and businesses and so help foster economic activity,” the banks said (2).

No one asked me, but I want to go on record as head of this household that I don’t want an endless supply of cheap credit.  No, I’ll simply go on participating in the organic mini-economy of lending and help that friends, family and neighbors have been quietly keeping going on for centuries.  And when we get to the last day of the month and the cupboards are nearly bare, we’ll hunker down and eat PB&J.  Sure we’ll miss the caviar and champagne, but won’t they taste better if we do the “everything must come down” part first?


1. Listen to the song here -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGE4dnrPPZQ

2. via Fed, central banks slash dollar borrowing costs – The Fed – MarketWatch.


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